HR Soft Skills: How to Listen with Intention

Listening is one of the most underrated (and unappreciated) soft skills in HR.

Many HR managers are good listeners. For those who work in a people-centered position, this is second nature. But when it comes to developing the soft skills of listening, important strategic components can fall by the wayside.

Listening isn't just about remaining silent and nodding at a conversation partner - it's also about your intention and subsequent communication.

Reimagine your current concept of listening: this is a soft skill that you can develop intentionally and use strategically to improve your role and workplace. Let's discuss how.

Recap: What are the 7 HR soft skills?
Soft skills are interpersonal and relationship skills and character traits that help you interact effectively with your employees.

You can use this mnemonic to remember the most important soft skills for HR: Rose's Retriever, Buddy, licks everyone's face regularly!

This easy-to-remember phrase corresponds to the 7 soft skills of HR: Redirecting, Framing, Encouraging, Reminding, Listening, Engaging (NOT!), and the Figure It Out Factor.

We will cover each of these soft skills in detail in other blogs. For now, let’s focus on listening.

Listening is more than just listening: it's body language
As an HR manager, you are often in a position to listen to your employees' hopes, fears, goals, ideas, concerns, and much more. Your job is not just to listen, but to make people feel heard.

Have you ever left a conversation thinking, “They didn’t hear anything I just told them.”? You don't want your employees to have this thought after a conversation with you, their HR manager. What makes you think someone isn't listening properly? Look at these two pictures and think about who is a better listener.

Both HR managers listen to the speaker, but only one ensures that the speaker knows they are listening. An important component of listening is making it clear that you are being heard. Body language is crucial.

What type of body language makes you feel heard? Make eye contact. Tilt your head and turn your shoulders toward the speaker. Keep your hands in front of you and don't fidget. Underline salient points with nods or acknowledgments. This seems natural because you are probably a natural listener. Body language emphasizes your intention and conveys your interest to the interviewer, whether you are in private or in a meeting.

What type of body language might convey disinterest? Stay seated when someone is standing. They fidget or look elsewhere. Reaching for the doorknob or other objects can give the impression that you are trying to escape. Touching your face or resting your head in your palm too much can be a sign that you are tired or bored.

There are ways you can change your body language to show the speaker that you are listening with intent. Here are some of them.

Tips for more effective listening
When you start thinking about listening not just as a smooth conversation, but as a strategic soft skill, you can use it more consciously. Here are some tips to help you:

Follow up your conversation by asking follow-up questions.
• Wait a few seconds before immediately responding to people's questions to make it clear that you have internalized their words.
• If someone asks you about a sensitive topic, find a private corner or room to talk.
• Ask that they intentionally take time to talk to you so that you can give them your full attention.
• The most effective tip for listening is to recognize when you SHOULD listen.

Recognize when to listen - and when not
As an HR manager, you're likely to be told things all the time that you wish you wouldn't.

But another resource at your disposal is another HR soft skill: disengagement. Non-engagement means politely not listening to things that don't concern you. This can be anything from complaints about the coffee machine to questions about taxes and more.

Your employees don't have the same expectations of their work as managers or yourself. They think that you are responsible for the coffee machine, because you ensure that employees are provided with office supplies and work to improve the company culture. What they don't know is that of course you want everyone to enjoy the coffee, but that the coffee machine is not your priority compared to everything else you have to do.

Sometimes the right thing to do is not to listen.

IceHrm empowers HR to navigate employee well-being with empathy and professionalism, setting boundaries while fostering support.